Recording Your Thoughts
Our thoughts shape how we see ourselves, our relationships, and the world. Some thoughts are helpful and guide us positively, while others are unhelpful and keep us stuck. This exercise will help you recognise the nature of your thoughts and take the first step towards changing them.
1. Thoughts Are Not Facts
It’s important to remember that thoughts are not always true. They are just ideas that pop into our minds, often shaped by past experiences, fears, or beliefs.
For example:
- Thought: "They haven’t replied to my text, so they must be angry with me."
- Reality: "They might just be busy or distracted."
By questioning whether a thought is fact or assumption, we create space to respond rather than react.
2. The Power of Automatic Thoughts
Some thoughts happen automatically. These are often negative, like a reflex from our brain trying to protect us. However, they can lead to emotions like sadness, anger, or anxiety.
For example:
- Automatic Thought: "I always ruin everything."
- Impact: This thought might stop you from trying new things or connecting with others.
Noticing when automatic thoughts appear is the first step to understanding how they influence your feelings and actions.
3. Identifying Thinking Traps
We all fall into common thinking traps. Here are a few examples:
- All-or-Nothing Thinking: Believing things are either perfect or a complete failure.
- Example: "If they don’t agree with me, they don’t care about me."
- Catastrophising: Assuming the worst-case scenario.
- Example: "If I say how I feel, they’ll leave me."
- Mind-Reading: Believing you know what others think without any proof.
- Example: "They must think I’m useless."
When you notice a thinking trap, remind yourself: "This might not be the full story."
4. Thoughts and Emotions Are Linked
The way you think affects how you feel. Unhelpful thoughts often lead to uncomfortable emotions like shame, frustration, or hopelessness.
For example:
- Thought: "I’ll never be good enough."
- Emotion: "I feel worthless."
- Behaviour: You might avoid social situations or stop pursuing your goals.
Changing the thought to something more balanced can ease these feelings and behaviours.
- New Thought: "I’m learning and improving, and that’s okay."
5. Choosing Your Thoughts
You don’t have to believe every thought that comes to mind. Imagine your thoughts as clouds in the sky. Some are dark and heavy, while others are light and fluffy. You can choose which ones to focus on and which to let pass.
Ask yourself:
- Does this thought help me feel better or worse?
- What would I say to a friend if they had this thought?
For example:
- Instead of: "I always mess things up," try: "I’ve made mistakes, but I’ve also achieved a lot."
Reflection Prompt
Take a moment to write down one thought you’ve been struggling with. Use the ideas above to explore:
- Is this thought helpful or unhelpful?
- Could there be another way to look at this?
- How would a kinder, more balanced thought feel?
How To Keep A Thought Record
This activity will help you gain insight into your thoughts and emotions throughout the day, promoting mindfulness and self-awareness. Please follow these steps to begin:
- Get Your Thought Record Template: You can download one from therapy-aid (here). You can also use notebook or on your phone.
- Carry Your Thought Record with You: Keep your thought record with you throughout the day, especially during moments when you experience strong emotions or stress. This will allow you to capture your thoughts and emotions in the moment.
- Pause and Reflect: Whenever you notice yourself experiencing significant thoughts or emotions, take a moment to pause and reflect. You may find it helpful to find a quiet space where you can focus on your thoughts without distractions.
- Record the Situation: Write down a brief description of the situation or context in which the thought or emotion occurred. This could be at work, during a social interaction, or while engaging in self-care activities.
- Identify Your Thoughts: Next, jot down the thoughts that came to mind during the situation. Try to be as objective as possible and avoid judgment. Simply write down what you were thinking in that moment.
- Label Your Emotions: Take note of the emotions you experienced in response to the situation. Rate the intensity of each emotion on a scale from 0 to 100%, with 0% representing no emotion and 100% representing the strongest possible emotion.
- Challenge Your Thoughts: Now, challenge any cognitive distortions or irrational beliefs present in your thoughts. Ask yourself questions like: What evidence supports or refutes this thought? Is there a more balanced way to view this situation? How would I advise a friend in a similar situation?
- Generate Alternative Thoughts: Finally, write down any alternative, more balanced thoughts you can adopt to reframe the situation in a healthier light. These alternative thoughts should be based on evidence and reason, rather than emotion.
- Review and Reflect: At the end of the day, review your thought record and reflect on any patterns or insights you've gained about your thought processes and emotional responses. Consider what you've learned and how you can apply it moving forward.
Be patient with yourself and celebrate your progress along the way. If you have a therapist they will be available to support you and help you make sense of your thought record during your sessions.